You might be surprised that there's no song title above, or you are not surprised because you don't give a damn. It is just... every song there is in my music library reminds me of each and every person I know or once knew and to my astonishment in this sudden realisation; there is not one single song that mirrors myself.

Moving on to the post, I have these thoughts I am willing to share -- as bloggers do. Sure, there might not be any songs that remind me of myself out there, however, words tend to contradict it. Hence, this post is, sort of, about yours truly.

It is funny how three words could simply shove people off your life temporarily; I am fine.

 Those three words could merely be what they are meant to be or otherwise.
I have seen it quite often that an individual tend to leave it be, even if the one who's saying it desperately wants tender loving care. But NO, they can't say it upfront because of their vulnerability and fear of being too... clingy, or useless or as if they can't take care of themselves. NO, they are not willing to lose that image of being strong, and independent.

It is heartbreaking that a person would lie to themselves for the sake of not wanting to burden anyone.
It is heartbreaking that you would rather bury your flaws, pain, midnight thoughts deep in the ground rather than letting it all out because you are terrified they will affect your friend's perception of you.
It is heartbreaking to know that you can't sleep, and it is already 3am and the pain in your chest stings even more as the time passes and you don't have anyone to talk to.
It is even more heartbreaking when someone actually asks you if there's anything wrong, if you want to talk about it, that they are all ears but you say; I am fine. 

The voices in your head are louder than the tunes from your headphones. You have tried your best to shut them out but these horrid voices, your dark thoughts... They are what's going to kill you, it almost did kill you. But you see, you are not a mess, burden, or anything negative, you are human and it is natural and it can be hard sometimes -- but you have gone this far. You have gone this far and why stop now? There's more to life than sulking, thinking about one thing that might matter to you now, but won't matter in the future. The world is huge, and the universe? More than this puny brain of mine could ever imagine.

Don't let a new year decide your change -- if you want to change, do it. Though it wont hurt to let your life goal be saying I am fine honestly. It sounds easy, but nothing sounds like what is meant.