Sometimes I am blinded by my own pain and problems to the point where I could not see that others are battling their own as well -- I am sorry for being selfish. I would not say much, I just woke up, but I honestly do hope everyone is keeping their heads above water no matter the roughness of the tide.

I am trying to write my first chapter for my hypothetical book with apologies and a sprinkle of optimism. Bright Eyes - Lua is playing delicately on my trusty new headphones that a kind friend of mine lent. 'Lua' is truly a fragile song; like a wilted flower that could fall anytime without anyone noticing.

I don't know about you, but I tend to trust on specific types of songs when I write -- the connection between me and the musician's words are indefinable. Same thing applies to your everyday life; you trust on an existing thought or act with your gut's approval or heart's or even brain's, and you go with it. You are one with whatever triggered you to do and you just do it as long as it's for the better.

I've come across a beautiful person who said she is one with the moon. I snickered the first time I heard it, however the more I think about it, the more I admire her beliefs. You can be attached to anything -- be it the moon, sun, stars, a person or God. People have different beliefs and that to me is what makes life sublime and intriguing.

You can define me as a depressed 18 year old filled with anxiety with the same percentage level as the water in her body, I don't mind. Society is obsessed with defining a person immediately lacking the effort to at least undergo the procedure of knowing them. I often wonder why because we have all of the time in the world, why not spend a portion of that 24 hours you have by knowing someone new or someone you thought you knew based on others' perspectives -- you'd be surprised or disappointed. Either way, it is worth your time because you would never know the outcome.

Getting lost in my thoughts is natural yet annoying for some of my friends, but they understand now. I have ADD, meaning I can't stay still or concentrate on one thing -- I have to do plenty of things at once even if I suck at multitasking, I have to do it. So, whenever I am still, my friends would stare for a good 20sec and go back to doing their own activity but with a slight thought of 'yep, she's in the zone'. You see, meeting people like them are rare-- they accept my eccentric being and also the pessimistic side of me.
 Blessed.

The reason I made a blog is so I can have a peace of mind by letting it all out. The difference between this and writing in my journal is; you are able to read my thoughts and I expect it to open your eyes or send you an important message even if the message is a speck of dust. I could categorise myself as an opened book as well as closed. I have said this before, my life is a roller-coaster and I tend to get squeamish and anxious when it goes down, though the euphoria I receive when it goes high up is incredible and I could not trade it for the world.

Life's tough, at least enjoy the ride a little bit longer. Remember to hold on tight -- for every action, there's an equal and opposite reaction.

Have a good day
xo